Perez Has Set Me Free!

Perez** Has Set Me Free!! **(The name has been changed to protect the innocent policeman)
I got stopped by a cop named Perez for making an illegal U-turn.
OK, I admit I was in the wrong, but that is no excuse for Perez to treat me like a criminal. I was very polite and friendly, and tried to explain my reasoning. "Usually in Florida, we can make U-turns, and I was looking for an opening to get to the street I wanted to turn onto, and there was no other way."
"No other way!?!" Perez sneered, acting like the cross examiner at a triple homicide trial. "You could have gone to the light, turned left, then turned left again at the next light, then turned left again. Or you could have turned right, then turned right again..." For Perez, there were MANY other ways.. I’m sure Perez might have suggested that I could have driven straight into the ocean, if Perez had been the type to resort to humor, but Perez did not strike me as the type. No, indeed, not Perez.
I floundered.. "Well, uh, I was looking at the destination street so intently that I didn’t see any "No U-turn" signs.
Here was his chance and he seized it!!! "NO "No U-turn" SIGNS?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!!!!! He cleared his throat, as if to tell the jury why I should be given the death penalty, "THERE ARE THREE "No U-turn" SIGNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I rest my case! Er, I mean, here is your ticket." And he scribbled out a ticket.
And on the ticket was a badge number and the name Perez. That’s how I knew his name was Perez. No first name, no Juan or Julio, no Pepito, no Miguel, not even Manny. Just Perez. The name almost as impersonal as the treatment he doled out.
I had told Perez the truth. I hadn’t seen the 3 "No U-turn" signs. But I know they were there because,
a.) Perez told me so, and
b.) I went back to look afterwards, in case Perez had made it up. Sure enough, there they were. I guess even Perez wasn’t sneaky enough to run and put them there afterwards just to get me in trouble.
So, I guess this means it was destiny that brought me and Perez together. But that didn’t mean that I like Perez. Perez was mean and rude, and maybe if I were 20 years younger Perez would have fallen for my sweet excuses, but I am an old broad who isn’t too cute anymore, especially in the eyes of Perez.
After Perez drove away, I broke down and cried. "Stop crying," said my sister-in-law, by way of trying to comfort me, I suppose. She had been in the car and had witnessed the whole interchange.
"I feel like crying and I won’t stop until I feel like stopping."
"He was a bastard. Forget about him." She was actually right. It wasn’t worth spending more time on him, but still I hadn’t spent all the tears I had inside me. So, after crying for a few more minutes, I got out of the car to visit my niece (who happened to live on the impossible-to-get-to street).
"Why do you think he was so mean," my niece asked me.
All I could think of was "maybe it’s because of his miserable existence." She nodded in complete understanding, and it occurred to me that it was exactly the point. Perez is not a happy person. For whatever reason, his life is not happy, and therefore, one cannot expect a happy encounter from a person such as Perez.
This threw open the philosophical floodgates. How much leeway do I need to extend to Perez? Should I have been more understanding on the spot? I had found myself hating him right away. What if his dog had just died? Maybe Perez has friends and a family, and is sometimes prone to laughter and even the occasional joke. Maybe Perez is a totally different person than the one who stopped me that day. Maybe he is the most loving, giving, understanding person in the Police Department. It is a stretch, I admit, but what if....
In any case, my encounter with Perez started me thinking about many things. What could I have done differently? Sure, Perez did not seem to care that I had spent most of my adult life pursuing the meaning of Life and Truth. Nor could I explain to him that although we did not seem to agree, I would do my best to release him from blame, because every fiber of my being knows that no matter what the situation, I must take my share of responsibility for being the co-creator of my life experiences.
Maybe if we were to meet under different circumstances, say, for instance, I was the main donor at a Policeman’s fundraiser that Perez helped to organize, then Perez might find it in his heart to appreciate some of my finer qualities, but Perez would have none of that now.
I had just made an ILLEGAL U-TURN, and Perez had CAUGHT ME IN THE ACT!
So, Perez and I were not destined to be chummy buddy-buddy pals, and I guess I’m just as glad about that as I’m sure Perez would have been if only he had known how much time I had spent thinking about him after the event.
However, I’m pretty sure that Perez will never know how his obvious lack of interest in me as a person that day has gripped my attention, and helped me to realize that no matter how nice I was, and how sincere, there are some people who will never appreciate these qualities. Hard to believe, but some people will just never like me. As a result I had to look inside and find my OWN self-appreciation, and learn to like myself despite what others may think of me. And for that alone, I say, "Thank you, Perez. You set me free!"